Am I enough? What am I doing with my life? Should I give up on doing that one thing?
These are the questions that keep me up at night. I haven’t experienced so much self-doubt in a while. I forgot how consuming it could be. It has sucked the joy and light out of my soul and has made me second-guess everything.
I feel like I am slowly losing a sense of who I am. And it scares the crap out of me. It’s like I’m trying to recreate a dream that is slowly slipping from my mind. Part of me won’t let go, while the other is ready to give up.
I allowed myself to get way too comfortable and now I’m suffering because of it. I feel trapped in a routine, that’s not even meant for me. I feel lost on a path I shouldn’t be on.
I’m ambitious yet unmotivated. Tired but awake all the time. Confused yet determined. I don’t know if that makes any sense.
I usually never fear the future, but recently whenever I think about what’s next for me, all I want to do is scream. Every day it feels like I’m falling deeper into the ground and further away from myself.
How do I know what to do when my mind and my heart want two different things?
I stumbled upon this quote in the middle of writing this post and for a moment everything felt ok:
“Self-doubt can be an ally. This is because it serves as an indicator of aspiration. It reflects love, love of something we dream of doing, and desire, desire to do it. If you find yourself asking yourself (and your friends), ‘Am I really a writer? Am I really an artist?’ chances are you are.
The counterfeit innovator is wildly self-confident. The real one is scared to death.”-Steven Pressfield (The War of Art)
I would’ve never for a second considered my self-doubt could possibly serve any good. I always assumed things that are meant to be should feel natural and never forced. But maybe that’s not always the case. Perhaps, the things that bring discomfort in our lives, and make us feel crazy at times, are meant to do so. If not, what’s the point?
If the things we loved were easy to achieve and didn’t require any hard work, would we still want it? If it fuels your soul with passion isn’t a little bit of doubt worth it? I can’t see why not.
- Be more compassionate about your dreams and goals.
- Don’t let one negative thought prevent you from doing what you love
- Take a break if you have to but don’t give up when things get difficult
- Stop questioning your worth
- Be patient with yourself
- Don’t let doubt prevent you from doing the thing you love.
- Remember that you’re not alone. What you feel now is universal. Everybody experiences doubt.